


a thousand miles ahead and behind

by moss_time



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Ben? Alive and well in my fics?? More likely than ud think, Character Study, Fluff, Gen, Happy Ending, Lila Pitts centric, Past Child Abuse, Sorta? I tried, Spoilers, Time Travel, what if lila just got to have a nice life hm?? handler dont interact
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:53:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26181451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moss_time/pseuds/moss_time
Summary: Lila, through the years following the 1963.
Relationships: Allison Hargreeves & Lila Pitts, Ben Hargreeves & Lila Pitts, Diego Hargreeves & Lila Pitts, Klaus Hargreeves & Lila Pitts, Lila Pitts & Everybody, Number Five | The Boy & Lila Pitts, Vanya Hargreeves & Lila Pitts, past Diego Hargreeves/Lila Pitts
Comments: 17
Kudos: 99





	1. Chapter 1

_1963._

_1969._

_1980_.

Moving. Always moving. If she stays in one place for too long they will find her. Are they after her?

They have to be. The Commission never stops. Lila would know. She's one of them. Was. 

So she never stops. Year after a year after a year to get as far as she can. She changes clothes as soon and as often as she can. Just in case. If they're truly after her something as trivial as clothing will not trick them, but she's desperate enough to use all she's got. Better safe than sorry. There's no room for error. 

She buzzes her hair off in 1980 and cries about it for an hour. _It'll grow back it'll grow back–_

But it's not really about the hair, or the shitty hotel room that smells like cat piss, or about how her legs hurt from walking and running, or the fuzziness in her head that time travel causes, or maybe it's all of it at once. It's definitely not about her mother, or Diego, or Five, no. 

She sits next to a half filled bathtub, clutching the briefcase to her chest. It's all she has. 

She can't sleep. Every time she closes her eyes she sees her mother. Her mother years ago taking her by her hand, her mother across the table as they eat dinner together, her mother shooting at her during training ( _For your own good,_ she says, hand stroking her cheek, and Lila never had any reason to doubt her.), her mother ready to shoot them, Diego, _her_. Would she have shot her? She would never. Her mother did plenty of dirty work but she would never hurt her, never. She repeats it like a mantra when she can't sleep until the sunlight creeps through the window. 

  
_1992._

  
They're not coming after her. Lila is sure of it now, she's been getting reckless, careless, she's barely sleeping and her hands are shaking almost constantly. She's never felt so lost and weak, not even when she was a kid. Her mother required her at her best, always. 

Despite it all there's not one trace of Commission agents. It's almost insulting. What's all this effort been for? What has she been running from? She almost wishes they came for her. It would at least give her a reason to keep going, and not this. Aimlessly jumping through time with no road and no destination and no one to turn to. 

_I'm somewhat of a lone wolf myself,_ she remembers saying. What a joke. Her mother was right. She's gotten sloppy, careless, started relying too much on someone else being at her side. What can a week do. 

She chucks Diego's bracelet in the toilet and pretends she doesn't see it not disappear down the drain as she flushes it. 

  
_2006_. 

  
It's a cold winter night and the balcony door of the motel she's staying at are broken. She's pushed chairs in front of it in an effort to keep it closed, but it only works so far. 

She's shivering under two blankets on the bed with a bottle of wine she got from room service. She doesn't have enough money to pay for it all but it's fine, she'll be gone before the sunrise. 

The bottle is half empty. Her mother was dead. She had lied to her for years. Since the moment they met. It was a plan, an _experiment_ , and she's succeeded. Almost. Her mother was dead and everything she ever told her was a lie. Or at least, everything that mattered.

 _W_ _hat does this mean for me,_ she thinks, her mind hazy from alcohol she's not used to. There's no one, nowhere for her to go.

Would it be so bad to have someone to rely on? Her mother would glare her into silence for this thought, but it's all she can think about, and her mother is not here. She's never wanted company so desperately before. 

Next morning she wakes up with the worst headache she's had in years. Hell, she can't remember ever having a headache this bad. Not even when she fell from a roof and hit her head badly during training. 

She glares at the almost empty bottle of wine. And people drink this _voluntarily_? 

It's morning already. She was planning to leave in the middle of the night but the alcohol knocked her out for a while and now she's late. Not like it matters. Not like there's anything waiting for her. 

Lila groans and stretches herself out on the bed. The self pitying doesn't suit her. 

So in a moment of impulsiveness, she makes a decision. 

  
_2020_.

  
It comes to no shock to Lila that she finds the world still standing in the year after the apocalypse was supposed to happen. The damn wonder kids are a stubborn bunch. Five himself acts like he could stop the world from turning if he so wished. She so wants to watch him burn. 

The briefcase teleports her in the middle of a street, causing two people to jump and stare at her. She gets away from them quickly. Sloppy. Careless. She walks until her feet burn and stops in front of an abandoned looking warehouse. It will have to do. 

She gets exactly an hour of peace and quiet before a smug looking schoolboy with a half empty coffee mug in his hand appears in front of her. Lila goes for a punch. 

Five evades it effortlessly, and it's all the proof she needs that she has really and truly reached the rock bottom. 

She sighs and gives up. If he wants her dead, well he's already beaten her before, and now she's the weakest she's ever been. Not to say that she'd go down without a fight. If he wants to talk there is nothing she can do to shut him up. 

Thankfully for them both Five clearly wants to talk. 

“I was wondering when you'd pop up,” he starts, already making her blood boil. She walks away to a small chair and tries to steady her breathing. If they're doing this she needs to be sitting down. 

“Oh yeah?” she spits out. “Such a smartass, you always knew I would turn up eventually, yeah?”

“Of course.”

God how she wants to punch him. “How did you find me?”

“I have my ways,” he says, that same infuriating smile on his face. “But that's not important now.”

“No but I'd like to know,” she insists. Five blinks at her, actually looking almost confused. Did he really think he'd get her off his back so easily? Maybe he's more of an idiot than she thought after all. “I have questions for you and you will answer all of them.”

Five stares at her for a moment. He sighs. “Is that all?”

_This fucking dick._

She's about to confirm when the words get stuck in her throat. Deep breaths. 

“Don't tell him I'm here,” she says. She's not ready to have that conversation yet. “That's all.”

Five raises an eyebrow. Lila wonders if he has the ability to not look condescending for even a second. “I wouldn't. That's none of my business.”

He's not wrong. It's something she has to do herself. Not that she'd ever ask _him_ to do anything for her. Except maybe answer some questions. And she has so many. 

“And since when am I your business?” she asks. He must have kept tabs on her somehow, if he knew when and where she arrived. 

“Since you decided to make yourself my business,” he says as he drags another chair to the shitty wooden table she's sitting at. He sits across. Far away to be able to get away but close enough to have a decent conversation. Lila hates his guts. “Now, what do you want to know?”

Lila wishes he'd lie to her. Or evade her questions, something, anything, because Five looking at her and truthfully answering all her questions makes her kind of sick. He's supposed to be a cunning assassin, one of the best, at the top. He was a legend at the Commission as much as he was a nuisance. And to have this person calmly give away his secrets and the secrets of the organisation he worked for, it feels– not right. 

He must have a plan. Something else going on that would cause him to tell her everything. But the straightforwardness with which he tells her about her parent's deaths and how the Handler orchestrated it stuns her to silence. He isn't lying. She can tell he isn't lying. He'd have no reason to, it was just another job to him. Another mark. And she's known the truth for some time now, but it doesn't make it easier to hear from someone else. 

“Lila,” Five says, breaking the thick silence between them. “I'm going to be honest with you.”

She shoots him a glare. “You better.”

The pathetic threat doesn't affect him in the slightest. His posture is so relaxed it's infuriating. 

“You were with the Commission. You know how time travel works,” he says, playing with his coffee mug. “The Handler killed us all. Expect for me. I managed to go back in time seconds before she entered the room and shot us all.”

Finally he looks up at her. There's something in his eyes Lila can't decipher and doesn't care to, not now. “She shot you.”

Her stomach drops. She's not sure why. This is exactly what she's been asking herself for weeks that she spent time travelling. Was Diego right? Did her mother give a shit? Would she get rid of her to achieve her goals? How much of her affection for Lila was an act? Did she love her?

Turns out, no. Her mother would kill her in cold blood. 

She should have known. One of her first lessons was about trusting no one and doing everything yourself. She thought herself so smart but in the end perhaps she's still the naive kid her mother took from her house. She's learned nothing. 

“Why should I trust you?” she asks, almost shocked by it herself. She doesn't feel like she can talk. She can barely breathe. 

Five mockingly puts his hands up. “I have no reason to lie to you.”

“Why tell me?”

She wishes he hadn't. Ignoring it was easier. 

Five grits his teeth again and looks her in the eyes. Lila digs her nails in her palms. 

“Diego was telling the truth, you know,” he says, voice surprisingly quiet, almost soft. She feels her whole body tense. “We could be your family. If you–”

“You _killed_ my family,” she yells, wishing it came out tougher, but it sounds more like a cry than anything else. 

Five squints, and for a second she thinks she sees him flinch. “Can you not see? Of all people you should understand this. You've done jobs for the Commission, you know the protocol, you know how it goes. How many people with families have you killed?”

“Yeah, for sure! Deflect all you want, you little rat. You can't escape the truth. You did it.”

“I was a pointed gun, Lila,” he leans towards her. The gall of this tiny piece of shit. “You know damn well who is to blame for their death.”

There are tears running down her cheeks and she briefly wonders how long she's been crying. Thankfully she couldn't care less what Five thought of her. 

“I don't believe you,” she lies. 

Five looks like he has more to say but he schools his face back to the ususal stoic expression in a second. “That's your business.”

He disappears in a shock of blue light and leaves her to the empty warehouse and her thoughts. 

  
*** 

  
The next day Five appears in the exact same spot. This time he has an envelope in his hand. 

He points a finger at her. “There's something I want to show you.”

Not waiting for her response, he starts walking out. 

She can't tell why she follows him. Maybe she's simply so desperate. Maybe it's that something in his eyes that she latched onto because it looks almost like worry and it makes her furious. And she's so, so tired.

Everyone she's ever known as her family is dead. The one person she trusted lied to her since the moment she knew her. There is nothing Five can do at this point that could hurt her more. So she takes her chances. 

Five leads her to an apartment building ten minutes away from where she had crashed for the time being. He doesn't turn around the check if she's following. Not that he'd need to, he can probably tell she's behind him. _One of the best,_ she can hear her mother's voice in her head. 

It's only at the building entrance that he turns around to look for her. She's close behind him, arms crossed across her chest. “So?”

Wordlessly, Five walks inside. Lila groans and follows. What does she have to lose? 

Five leads them to the third floor of the building up a steep staircase. He stops in front of the door to one of the apartments and looks up at her. He holds out the envelope. “A place to stay while you're here. If you want it.”

Lila grits her teeth. Is this some sort of fucked up way of him trying to make it up to her? For murdering her parents? If not, why the hell would he go out of his way to do this? 

She punches him in the face. Five staggers backwards, hand clutching at his jaw. Lila snatches the envelope from his other hand. 

As she assumed, there is a key in it. 

“Why the hell did you assume I'm staying here?” she demands. 

“Well, you haven't left yet, have you,” he says, and it's not so much the smugness but the certainty with which he says it that makes Lila want to punch him again. 

“I could leave right this second,” she says, holding up the briefcase. “And you couldn't stop me.”

“I wouldn't dream of trying,” he says, and Lila believes him. He's a reckless wildcard, a monster, but he's not stupid. 

“So what the hell is this then?”

Five sighs, hand holding his jaw now dropping at his side. “I just–”

He opens his mouth. Sighs again. Lila raises a brow at him. “Cat got your tongue?”

“Take it or don't,” he says and turns to leave. “I don't care either way.”

***

Despite her better judgement, Lila likes her new apartment. It's just enough for her to be comfortable, which is a new and scary thing to feel. She wonders how Five got the key for her. Maybe better not to think about it.

There's snacks in the the fridge. She doesn't want to touch any. This could still be a trick he's trying to pull, a cruel and cunning plan that she's sure someone like Five would be able to come up with. 

She throws out all the food from the apartment. Checks every corner and crack and moves all furniture. There's a knock on the door and an unfamiliar voice asking about the noise that she ignores. In the end she passes out on the couch from exhaustion. Sloppy. Careless. 

Next morning she wakes up in an uncomfortable position, her neck hurting and with an empty stomach.

There's a small bakery across the street. She scraps what little money she has left and goes to get something to eat. A croissant sounds like heaven at the moment. 

This time she's not surprised when she turns around to find Five standing there. She takes a bite out of her croissant. It's still warm.

“Want something from the bakery, little bastard?” she points at the store behind her. 

Five gives her one of his fake smiles. “No, thank you. Already ate.”

As if she'd actually get him shit. “Suit yourself.”

She starts walking towards the apartment building and is unsurprised when Five walks alongside. She decides she's had enough of this. 

“Okay, what's the deal,” she starts. “Are you my babysitter now? Is that how the Commission is dealing with me?”

“What the fuck are you on about?”

“What's all of this,” she gestures around the street. “Seeking me out? Having a normal conversation? The apartment? The snacks? Do you think I'm an idiot?”

“Occasionally.”

She swings at him. Five teleports a foot to the right. 

“There's no _deal_ here,” he says, squinting. “I don't work with the Commission. I have no idea what their plans are regarding you, but I imagine if they were after you you'd be dead. Or at least in more of a hurry.”

Lila glares at him, chewing. It's a great croissant, if nothing else. God forbid that she gets to enjoy it in peace. 

“This isn't some kind of trick,” Five continues. She wishes he would shut up, but she also does want to hear what he has to say. Truly infuriating. “I'm not– I don't have a plan–”

“That's a first.”

“–Yeah, I hate it, also,” he makes a face. He looks around, like he's not sure what to say or do. Good. Exactly how she wants him. “I know it looks fishy, and bad and all, but I swear I'm not trying to do anything.”

Lila tilts her head to the side. “Don't lie to me. You're obviously trying to do _something_.”

“I just thought I'd help,” he says at last. 

“How uncharacteristic of you.”

“I know. It's been a weird year. I've had time to think.”

She thinks she sees what's happening now. “This is some kind of fucked up way of you trying to feel better about murdering my family, yeah?”

Five tenses. 

“You're a disgusting little shit, you know that,” she says and takes another bite. 

“I'm not going to have another conversation with you about what an assassin is,” he says through gritted teeth. “But sure. I know.”

“Good. And I don't need your help. I was doing perfectly fine,” she wasn't, not quite, but he doesn't need to know that. What's it to him. She's not about to become his weird redemption story. What a shit. “I'll keep the apartment though.”

“Knock yourself out.” 

Then he's gone, and Lila can finally enjoy her breakfast in blessed silence. 

  
***

There's a small convenience store close by that she manages to get a job at. It's boring, going from an assassin to a retail worker, but at least she has some regular income. 

It's been almost two weeks with no sight of Five. A good thing. It's been almost two weeks and she hasn't felt the need to bolt to another year. A bad thing. 

The briefcase is hidden under her bed and she pulls it out each morning and night just to check on it. All intact. It's reassuring to know it's there, knowing that she has an option to leave the moment she wants to. 

But there's nowhere to go and she's tired of being on the run constantly. And her mother isn't here to scold her about it. 

The first time she thinks about running again is when Vanya Hargreeves walks into the store. She doesn't notice her immediately and Lila hopes to be done with the shelf she's rearranging before Vanya looks in her direction. 

She pointedly stares at her hands as she's working, refusing to look over. She still knows the exact moment she's spotted. And the moment Vanya leaves the store. Her palms are sweating. Later that night when she gets to her apartment she makes a beeline to the bedroom, to the bed and pulls out the briefcase. She doesn't open it, just grips it tightly and breathes. 

Five could have told his family about her being here. He obviously hasn't, Vanya leaving in such a hurry wouldn't make sense in that case. She's not sure if she's thankful for his discretion now, when it may create more problems. It's the closest to panic she's felt in two weeks. She let her guard down. Sloppy. Careless. 

Next day she makes her way to the Umbrella Academy. A foolish idea, perhaps. But the cat's out of the bag now, so might as well. 

She's still Lila though, and knocking on the door seems a bit... Unprofessional. So she climbs up the wall to Five's room. It's easy, and it's even easier to locate which room is his. Both because he's the only person who'd have all four walls of his room covered in equations, and because he is in the room at the moment. He's hunched over his tiny desk with two empty coffee mugs next to him and a notebook. 

Lila drops in through the window. “Boo.”

Surprisingly enough, Five jumps and his notebook goes flying off the desk. He stares at her, mouth agape. Lila laughs. This is the best thing she's seen in months. 

“You–”

“Me!” she spreads her arms. “Letting your guard down, Mr Best Assassin in the Commission, huh.”

“Look who's talking,” he grumbles and tries to take a sip of his coffee, only to find it empty. “I heard you had a run in with my sister last night.”

“She left so soon,” Lila sighs. “How much trouble am I in?”

“Depends. Who are you here for?” 

She shurgs. “No one in particular. I'd just like to know.”

“No one here is about to go on a search for you, so you can relax. But Luther and Allison are ready to jump at your throat at any moment, if the see you, that is,” he says, twirling a pen between his fingers. “So you know, maybe don't go to them. Ben and Klaus I'm not sure about. Vanya and Diego are fine, probably.”

Lila hums. She should think it over. 

As soon as the thought crosses her mind she squashes it. She is _not_ engaging with them. She's here simply to test the waters, make sure she's not actively in danger. 

“Diego is really pissed that I didn't tell him,” Five continues. Her brain short-circuits for a moment. “I don't care, he'll cool off in a day, but I thought you should know.”

“I don't owe him shit.”

Five shurgs. “I didn't say you do. Just relaying the message. The vibes. So you know.”

She must have been making a face because Five hurries to add. 

“He's not mad at you, just at me. For keeping it from him, I assume,” he explains. 

“Obviously. He has no reason to be mad at me,” she says. It's the one lie that stings. 

Five squints at her. “I don't know. You did spend months lying to him, then drugged and kidnapped him. I'd be mad.”

“Well, you're a little shit.”

“Fair enough,” he sighs. For someone who claims not to give a shit, he sure has a lot of opinions. “It's none of my business. If he wants to walk around and be an idiot, he might as well. It's never stopped him before.”

“Seems to run in the family.”

Five shoots her a venomous smile. 

***

A month after she arrived is when Vanya finds her in the store again. 

Five seems to have decided to leave her alone, which she's happy about. The less she sees his face the less is the chance that she'll try to kill him again. 

Diego doesn't come looking for her like she feared he might, after that conversation with Five. It's a relief. A bit of a disappointment. It means when she decides to talk to him she will have to make the first step, which has never before been a problem for her, but this has gotten... messy. 

She can't pinpoint the exact moment when she decided that she will definitely talk to him. Eventually. It's another one of those scary thoughts that she's not used to. _I don't want to run,_ turns into _I don't want to leave. This apartment,_ turns into _my apartment. If I ever talk to Diego,_ turns into _when._ It's daunting. 

It's one of those moments when Vanya walks in the store again. She sees her, hair down and tucked behind the ears, making her way between the shelves. And the thought she has is, _If I'm staying I might as well rip the bandage off._

When did she decide that she's staying? 

She doesn't have time to contemplate, because Vanya notices her looking and after a moment of stillness she walks right up to her. Almost as if she got here to find her. 

For a second she's just there, looking as lost as Lila feels, opening her mouth and closing it a few times. “Lila, right?”

Lila nods. 

“You work here?”

Lila raises her eyebrow. “Obviously.”

“Yeah. Of course. I'm sorry.”

Why is she apologising?

“It's just that,” she stammers, avoiding the eye contact. “I live here, in the street. I come here often. I thought– I don't want this to be weirder than it already is.”

“It's gonna be pretty weird.”

“I know. Still,” she closes her eyes and sighs. “Do you wanna get a coffee sometime?”

 _What_?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lila has a mostly good time. Thats it basically

Vanya lives ten minutes away from Lila's place. She can't believe. It's a miracle they haven't ran into each other sooner. 

Lila agrees to a coffee, mostly by being taken aback and at a loss for words. She agrees to another coffee, and another, and soon it's almost a routine, every Saturday morning she and Vanya would meet for a drink at a coffee shop in the street. 

It's nice. It's weird. She's never had anything similar to this sort of relationship, a person her age who just wanted to talk to her about mundane stuff, like the construction close by, or the weather. The _weather_. 

And it was surprisingly fine. It was awkward the first time, the first few minutes, neither of them quite knowing what to say and how to start the conversation, but Vanya seemed determined enough to work this out. Why, Lila couldn't imagine. 

The closest they come to actually discussing their complicated history is during the first coffee meet up, when Lila couldn't hold it in anymore. 

“Remember when I tried to kill you and your whole family?” she asks, certain that this will be the end if their little... Whatever this is. 

Vanya nods. “Remember when I started the apocalypse and almost killed everyone on Earth? Twice.”

And that's the end of it. Lila decides not to bring it up. She tells herself it's for her safety, she can't get too comfortable after only a month of being in the city. But deep down she knows it's because she's come to genuinely enjoy their little coffee talks. If she raises too many questions she might ruin it. Surely if Vanya wanted to talk about it she'd bring it up. 

This time, she's running late. She woke up to find out there's no water, and her neighbour mentioned something about constructions, and she spent the whole morning waiting for it to come back because the idea of leaving the apartment without a shower pained her. 

It's a miracle she's only half an hour late. She sent Vanya a text, saying she'll be late, to order her whatever and to leave if it takes her too long. She's still there when Lila walks in, in their usual spot. 

She waves over as Lila makes her way to her. “I got your order. Caffè mocha, right?”

It is right. The fact that she knows that is– well. 

“Thanks,” she gives her a small smile and takes a sip. It's just another regular Saturday after all. 

  
***

Strangely enough, the third Hargreeves sibling that she has an unplanned encounter with is Luther. 

Vanya is walking with her from the store. Her shift just ended and they were there at the same time, so why not? Then a car pulls up in the parking lot and a huge man exits it. Lila distinctly remembers Five warning her about Luther. Though she really can't say she fears the big guy, she's already beaten him once, and there doesn't seem to be a lot in his head. 

Vanya doesn't have much of a reaction. She greets her brother, and completely misses on the look he's giving Lila. Lila shoots him a smile. It's not the small friendly one that's reserved for Vanya, it's more of a warning, a promise, and not a friendly one. 

“What are you– What is _she_ doing here?” he demands, now looking more confused than angry. Lila thinks he might have been more happy to find the two of them in the middle of a fight, it would be easier for him to stomach. He would be able to have a more straightforward reaction. 

Vanya blinks at him. “She works close by. And lives.”

“I know– No, Vanya– Vanya she's dangerous,” he says. A whole idiot. Yes, a dangerous woman out to get you, but please talk about it as she's standing right here with a bag of groceries. That'll do it. “Why–”

“No, it's fine,” Vanya cuts him off and rolls her eyes. “She's my friend.”

Now it's Lila's turn to look confused. Luther visibly shares her sentiment. They're _friends_? 

“Can you please not make a thing out of this?” Vanya, oblivious to her shock, tells him with clear annoyance in her voice. It's really more of a demand than a plead. It's the most serious she's seen her since they started hanging out. 

“She tried to _kill_ us–”

“Yeah, she's one of many. She's fine, Luther.”

Lila feels extremely weird having someone else vouch for her. She always been keen to prove herself, but this time she's stunned to silence. 

Luther looks at her. She looks back at him. Vanya looks at them both as if asking if they're able to keep it civil. Lila privately wonders how did her life get to this. 

***

The first time another person sets foot in Lila's apartment is one late winter night, as it snows furiously outside. She's already showered when her phone lights up with a new message on screen. 

_**Vanya** : Hey, I left my keys at my family's place and Im already right here, is if fine I come over for a bit? _  
_**Vanya** : Just until Luther gets here with my keys. _

_**Lila** : sure_  
_**Lila** : pizza? _

_**Vanya** : Id love that :-) _

Lila orders a pizza and waits. She can't tell why she's nervous, people do this all the time, right? Not like there's anything here she has to be nervous about.

Vanya appears at her door shivering with snowflakes melting in her hair. It takes Lila all her self restrain not to ruffle it. 

“Come in,” she waves her over. “The pizza should be here soon. I think.”

She hears Vanya exhale behind her, slowly getting rid of her damp jacket and scarf. “I like your place.”

Lila almost scoffs at that. There's not much to like about this apartment, but Vanya has never lied or been purposely mean to her, so she has no reason to assume she's being a jerk now. But her place is pretty standard and empty, she doesn't own a lot. It's a small space, just enough for one person to live comfortably. 

“There's not much here,” she says.

“Well, you haven't been here for long,” Vanya shrugs. Her hands are deep in her hoodie pockets as she tries to warm them up. “It will become more of a home with time. Trust me. I felt the same when I first moved into my apartment. It was so bare and lonely, especially after years of living with six siblings.”

Lila can't imagine how Vanya survived with them. How she still survives with them. She's such a small, quiet presence, that even though she knows very well Vanya can take care of herself, it's hard to imagine her amongst all those assholes. 

“I don't know how you do it,” Lila admits. “I spent merely a few days with Five and Diego and they already drove me up the wall.”

Vanya laughs softly. Most of what she does, she does softy. Lila finds it admirable, she has always felt too sharp, too sudden. It was good for her work in the Commission, but now it feels sort of out of place. 

“They have that effect on people,” Vanya mutters. “But they're good.”

Lila knows. For Diego at least. Five, she'd rather not think about. 

Some time later they're lounging on the couch and eating pizza, Vanya wrapped in a blanket Lila managed to find. Her hair has dried off and she's stopped shivering. It's been a bit, long enough for Lila to forget that Luther is supposed to bring Vanya's keys. 

She's reminded of it when Vanya groans at her phone and chucks it under the pillow she's leaning against. 

Lila looks at her with a raised brow. 

“Luther,” Vanya explains. She lets out a sigh. “He's being stupid about this whole thing.”

Lila takes a big bite of her pizza. “This whole thing?”

“Me, being in your apartment hanging out,” she rolls her eyes. This must be a reoccurring thing if she's so nonchalant about it. “You know how he is.”

“Yeah. Can't get shit through that thick head of his.”

That gets a laugh out of Vanya and Lila feels weirdly proud of it. She could feel her mother glaring daggers at her from her grave. 

“God, I still remember that day I first saw you,” Vanya says. She's put down her plate and turned fully towards Lila. “He was so mad. Imagine his face when Five waltzed in saying he knew you were here.”

She looks down at her hands, fingers playing with the edges of the blanket. “It was so unexpected. I felt so stupid later, running out of the store like that.”

“You left so quickly,” Lila grins. “I was sure the next thing I'd be seeing some of your siblings at my door.”

It's only partially a joke. The Hargreeves are, as much as they're a mess, a tight knit family. She remembers very well how fiercely they all fought to keep her from harming just one of them. 

Vanya for her part looks almost guilty. Lila is just about to tell her she was joking when she starts talking again. 

“I didn't know you then. I had only seen you once and it was,” she grimaces, obviously nervous. “You know. All the fighting. There was a lot going on.”

Lila nods. A lot going on. That's one way to describe it.

“I wanted to hear what the rest of them had to say before I made a decision,” she continues. “They–”

Lila can't suppress the laugh. “I'm going to guess they were not happy about it.

“It went like all our family meetings go,” Vanya sighs and gives her a look. “Five tried to be reasonable, Luther and Allison got overprotective. Diego got angry. Klaus gave up on listening halfway, and Ben rolled his eyes a lot. Like I said. As all family meetings go.”

Lila scoffs. She's almost glad she's an only child. “Sounds fun.”

Vanya shakes her head. There's a small smile on her face though, and it's not hard to see how fond she is of her family, disastrous or not. 

“How come you didn't–” she bites the inside of her cheek. How to ask this without it being weird. A challenge. “They don't seem to trust me much. For a good reason, I guess. But you still came to me.”

She can't tell what the look on Vanya's face means. 

“Five and Diego vouched for you,” she says at last. “That was enough for me.”

Her stomach drops for a moment. She's not sure what surprises her more, that Diego still trusts her enough to assure his sister that she's safe, after all Lila did, or that Five, that piece of shit of all people, decided she's worth keeping around or at least being left alone. What a fucked up family. 

How should she feel about this? Good? Guilty? Anxious? She never had any training for this part.

Vanya reaches for her and slowly puts a hand over Lila's. “I promise you, there's nothing to worry about. They won't try anything.”

That isn't quite what's turning around Lila's head right now, but it's reassuring either way. “I'm not worried.”

And she's not. For the first time in a long time, she doesn't feel like she needs to run. 

***

It's been four months. There is a routine to her life now which is unusual, because it's a rather tame one. She has a job, a _friend_ to meet for a coffee, and she just took up a dancing course for fun. For fun. As like, a hobby. It's ridiculous. 

Lila is good at it, because of course she is, she's learned how to dance ages ago. It comes practically like walking to her. So it might be kind of useless, but it's something to look forward to. It helps her feel more like a normal person trying to get by rather than an ex time travelling assassin who has exactly zero idea what she's doing. 

It lulls her in a sense of security, which honestly terrifies her. She's well aware of how furious her mother would be over how she's spending her time. But her mother isn't here. Her voice in Lila's head is slowly becoming more of a nuisance than a guide. 

It's some of those thoughts that brings her to the doors of the Umbrella Academy. Is it because she's gotten too comfortable ( _sloppy_ , _careless_ , _she hears her mother scold_ ), or that she's actively looking for a fight, something to give her a goal and a reason to go back to the life she's used to. Perhaps it's just plain foolishness. 

Lila knocks on the door, lightly. When no one comes to answer, she picks the lock. Easier than she thought it'd be. 

She lets herself in. 

The Hargreeves home opens with a huge, spacious hall, surprisingly quiet for the family that resides in it. She's not sure what she expected but this is not it. A big mansion? Sure. A cold, silent space with no sign of life in it? No, that doesn't seem right. Even the little time she's spent with a few of them is enough for her to find this weird. 

She doesn't like it much herself. Too open, too vast. Not enough bickering idiots around. 

Before she can step further in, make her way to another, hopefully less grim room, a figure walks through the door. 

Lila lets out a shaky exhale. Diego, standing in the doorway of what she can imagine is a living room, seems to be in the same state. 

A shout comes from behind him. “Close the fucking door asshole!”

Yeah. That sounds more like the Hargreeves family she remembers. 

She stands there, thoughts racing, as Diego closes the door and continues to stand there. All of her wants to yell at him to say something, dammit, but perhaps it's her turn to talk now. 

It's not hard to read Diego. She hadn't lied when she said he's an open book. From the moment they met in that horrid place she's known him as straightforward and genuine, both in his anger and his care. So she knows, despite all her fears and scenarios she's ran through her head when she couldn't sleep late at night, that he's not angry at her. 

A small part of her wishes he would be. It's so much easier to deal with anger than worry and fondness. She's not used to it. Perhaps it's why she came to love him, he had too much of both for her. 

She feels so small suddenly. For all her 29 years of life there haven't been many people that she's come to trust and care for. Even less people whose opinion of herself she cares for. Her parents, her mother, Diego. And only one of those people is still alive and breathing and right in front of her, and the last time she saw him she was trying her best to murder him and his whole family. It's a situation alright. 

_We can be your family. If you just let us._

She so desperately hopes he still thinks that.

And isn't that a horrifying thought? 

“I– Uh,” she stutters, all the planned words and explanations dissipating like smoke. Diego stands there looking at her, wide eyed. For all the times he couldn't keep his mouth shut, now he's decided to have nothing to say? 

She's never been so at a loss for words. What is there to say? Apologising feels so cheap, it feels like an easy way out. But she has nothing else. 

“I'm sorry,” Lila says, wishing it would sound more confident, but her voice fails her. “Shit, I'm so sorry.”

She doesn't get much further than that before Diego is at her side and she being pulled in a hug, and she feels herself melt against him. She's missed this, hell, she's missed him. It's another scary thing to admit. 

“You okay?” he asks, all gentle and forgiving and it takes all Lila's willpower not to cry right then and there. 

She takes a moment to breathe and nods. “Yeah. I'm okay.”

_2021._

For whatever goddamn reason, Vanya decides that bringing Lila to a dinner at their home would be a good way to start the new year. She assures her that it won't be weird. They will all be civil and it will work itself out. 

It does not work itself out. Mostly. There isn't a big fight in the middle of the meal, no one gets a black eye or a broken leg, so really it is a success in her book. But Lila can sense when she is not welcome. And she senses it the moment Allison and Luther lay their eyes on her. 

Luther tries, an emphasis on tries, to subtly interrogate her during dinner. What he gets from it is a bunch of vague answers from Lila, glares that could kill from Vanya, and a threat of bodily harm from Diego. This does not seem to phase him at all. 

Five seems vaguely uncomfortable and doesn't speak much, which Lila relishes in. Mouth shut, he's almost bearable. Almost. 

Allison spends the entire evening looking at her as if she's about to take out a gun and shoot them. She doesn't have a gun. A gun has never been her weapon of choice, she's much more fond of her own fists and maybe daggers if needed. Though she doubts saying that would make Allison feel any better about her presence. 

Ben and Klaus are sort of a mystery. They don't try to start shit, they don't straight up antagonize her, but they keep their distance. Perhaps they've decided the rest of their siblings can handle the antagonizing part on their own. 

Lila, frankly, is not hurt by any of this. She expected worse. They are disastrous enough for her to expect the unexpected at any moment. All in all, It's not the worst night she's had. 

The calmest moment is after dinner when they all scatter around the kitchen and the living room and Ben shows up with a box of ice cream. 

“Should we call them?” Klaus gestures to the direction of the living room, where Vanya went to presumably argue with Luther, and Allison trailed behind them. Five disappeared shortly after them to God knows where. 

Ben shakes his head and takes a scoop of the strawberry flavor. “If they're not here, they're not getting any. Their loss.”

“More for us,” Diego agrees. 

It's as the four of them are eating ice cream in a relatively comfortable silence that Klaus actually turns to her for the first time that night. 

“So, Lila, dear,” he starts, playing with his spoon. He gives her a smile that she can't tell if it's genuine or if it's a way of him making fun of her. “How did you like seeing our family at it's best? Because believe me, it gets no better than this.”

She smiles back at him. He grins. It's a weird way of communicating. “I've never been so warmly welcomed.”

“Yeah, we love to leave a good first impression,” Diego grumbles in his cup. 

“Please,” Klaus sighs. “She's already met you and Five. I'm sure as your girlfriend she knew very well what to expect.”

“Ex girlfriend,” they both interrupt him. 

Klaus brings up his hands in defeat.

Then he jumps out of his chair and sends his spoon clattering to the floor as Five appears next to him. The little man looks like he has something planed to say until he sees what they're all eating and his eyes widden. 

“You brought out ice cream and no one fucking called me?” he glares. 

“Should have been here,” Ben shrugs, eating the last bits of ice cream directly from the box. 

No, definitely not the worst night she's had. 

***

After all of that, Lila starts spending more and more time at the Hargreeves' mansion. Vanya insists, apparently set to prove her siblings that Lila was _fine_ , thank you very much. 

At first she's not sure how to feel about that. It's not like she needs them to like her, or wants to prove herself to them. But she does like Vanya, and Diego, and maybe Klaus is more fun than she first anticipated. 

She doesn't have much of an opinion on Ben before this one day when he keeps staring at her. 

She had come over to pick up Vanya, and then got roped into trying Klaus' pancakes. She's slowly picking at one burnt, thin and barely alive pancake, and she can feel Ben looking at her. He has been for the past few minutes. Initially she wasn't going to point it out, they are all weirdos in their own ways, but it's getting pretty annoying. 

“Do I have something on my face, ghost boy?” she asks. 

He startles at first but recovers quickly. Lila has a fleeting thought of how weird it must be to have spent most of your life as a ghost no one could see, and suddenly people see you again. Still, kind of weird to stare.

“Your make up is very nice,” he says finally. “How do you do it?”

The admission shocks her. She's not sure what she expected, maybe just a quick 'sorry' or a shitty excuse, maybe he spaced out, but the bits of shitty make up she wore?

“I uh,” she frowns, more to herself than Ben. “Apply it? To my face?”  
  
He huffs a laugh. “No shit.”

“Look dude, I don't know. It's just black eyeliner and a bit or eyeshadow.”

That doesn't seem to be the answer he was hoping for, but unfortunately for Ben there's no secret to her make up. An idea strikes her. 

She leans forward on the table. He squints. “Want me to do it for you?” 

Ben's eyes light up. Maybe he's alright after all. “Definitely.”

***

Befriending Ben turns out to be the right thing. Once they see he trusts her, the rest of the family loosens up a bit. Luther doesn't seem as tense as he used to be around her. Klaus' quips at her become less sarcastic and more friendly. At some point he ever asks her for a ride. Five still doesn't spend much time around her, but that's a whole other thing. She doesn't want him around much. 

Allison still regards her carefully, never lets down her guard around her, and Lila wonders if she's still mad about her almost killing her. She guesses she can't judge. But the more time she spends with them the more it becomes obvious that Allison's guard is there more for her family's sake than her own. Lila thinks how nice it must be, to have someone care so much. 

And maybe Lila wouldn't care so much about Allison's attitude towards her, which she'd never admit she does, if she didn't genuinely like her. 

Unfortunately she does like her, has liked her since the moment Allison smiled and punched her in the face, which is a fucked up thought and maybe Lila should find a better way of making friends. 

“Your sister really doesn't like me,” she complains to Diego one evening when he showed up with some take out. They're both sprawled out on her tiny couch waiting for Vanya to show up. She better hurry because Lila doesn't think she can hold Diego from eating her food too for a lot longer. 

He takes a fry from her plate. “Which one?”

“The one that is not on the way to my place right now,” she says and kicks his thigh. “Stop stealing my dinner.”

“Look, it's Allison,” he says as if it's supposed to make everything clear. “I don't think she likes me either.”

“Yeah, of course, you're her _brother_ ,” she points out. Diego reaches for her plate again so she shoves the rest of the fries in her mouth. “If you were my brother I couldn't stand you either.”

Diego might be the worst person to ask for advice about this, she realizes. Diego might be the worst person to ask for advice, period. 

It's not that Lila needs Allison to like her. No, she doesn't need anyone to like her, she's perfectly fine on her own, but if they want to like her, well, she won't complain. It just kind of bothers her. It's a new feeling for her, there's never been a person she actively wants to be liked by before. She hates it. 

“Hey,” she's dragged out of her thoughts as Diego puts a hand on her shoulder. “Don't worry too much about it, really. She'll come around.”

Lila isn't so sure. Not much she can do about it though. Allison has plenty of reason to dislike her, even if she hates to admit it. 

After a minute of silence Diego turns to her. “Do you want me to talk to her?”

“ _God, no!_ ”

Diego exhales in relief. “Thank God.”

***

The change in Allison's attitude doesn't happen at once, it's a gradual thing. And Lila notices every change because she's paying attention and she's very good at noticing details. 

The biggest step forward is when Allison comes up to her after lunch one day and announces that they're going shopping. 

“Oh,” Lila swallows the last bit of her food. “That's alright, I was just leaving.”

“No, no,” Allison stops her. Lila gives her a weird look. “You're going with us.”

Lila blinks at her slowly. 

“If you want to,” she adds hurriedly. “It's just that, I know you haven't been here for long and it must have been difficult, adjusting. And I always see you in one of those three sweaters– which are great! But I thought maybe you'd–”

She's cut by Klaus' loud groan. “Oh my God, Allison, stop talking. You're making it worse. Not everyone has two wardrobes.”

Lila can't suppress a laugh. It's not every day that she has Allison Hargreeves stammering in front of her. She even looks worried now, which is so absurd but Lila hopes that will keep her from noticing how happy she is about this invitation. 

In about five minutes they're crowded in Lila's small car, with her behind the wheel, Allison having won her rights for the shotgun, and Klaus and Ben in the back seats. Klaus immediately invited himself to go along and Ben was allowed to come if he promised to get something that isn't a hoodie. She's glad that they're here. It makes it less awkward. 

That night Lila drives them back to their house feeling lighter than she has in a while. It feels important, knowing she has Allison on her side, and maybe a shopping trip is a stupid reason for her to believe that but she doesn't care. It's the first time they spend time together that Allison doesn't seem to be on edge, and actually engages lot more in a conversation with her, even ignoring Klaus and Ben's comments to finish what she was saying to Lila. It's a new but good feeling, to have Allison acknowledge her as a friend rather than a possible threat. 

All in all, it's a successful trip. 

Ben sneaks away another hoodie while Allison and Klaus are distracted. He gets a gentle punch in the shoulder from Lila but she's not a snitch. He lets her get away with another turtleneck as a thanks.

“I see why you and Diego get along,” Klaus muses as she tries on a black leather jacket. The last one she had had started to tear and still had blood on it. “The obsession with turtlenecks, black and leather. It all makes sense now.”

Lila sticks her tongue out at him. He happily returns the gesture. Ben and Allison pretend they don't know them for a moment. 

Her mother's voice in her head screams about how irresponsible, childish and inexcusable her behavior is, but she pushed it down, she's actually having _fun_ and there's not even a threat of murder anywhere around. 

It all goes smoothly until the moment a dress aisle catches her eye. 

There weren't many occasions that let Lila wear a dress. A few, sure, all of them missions her mom sent her on. Including the last time, during their time in the 1963. It was a beautiful dress, even more so with the memories attached to it. The end kinda ruined it, but she will always remember the dance fondly. She hadn't kept it, too afraid of what her mother might say. Accuse her of being sentimental, falling for her mark or some other shit. She had thrown the dress away and still regrets it. 

Allison notices her looking. “Do you wanna try some on? We have the time.”

“I don't really have where to wear them,” she admits. Allison, a world famous actress, probably doesn't have that problem. 

“You don't need a special occasion for a dress,” Allison says, almost like she expected this problem. She puts a hand on Lila's back and gently starts guiding her towards the aisle. Lila lets her. “You can just wear them. Who can tell you not to?”

Who can, indeed. 

She stays over at the Hargreeves' place that night, bullied into watching a movie with the three of them. It's not the first time it's happened but it is the first time Allison sits next to her, and she's genuinely comfortable. 

_2022._

2022 is a surprisingly uneventful year. Which she supposes is good, it's a chance to sit down and have mild breakdowns about what the fuck has been happening, and what the fuck is she doing, et cetera, et cetera. 

It all starts falling into place however. Her apartment gradually feels more like home, warmer, louder with the people dropping by every now and then. Because as it turns out, if you befriend the Hargreeves they will automatically think of your place as their place as well. She manages to get a job as a dance instructor, which is a wonderful change from the boring retail job that made her want to murder more people on a daily basis than she did during her time as an assassin. 

The most important change happens on a rainy morning mid July. It's disgustingly hot and humid, and she's sitting on the floor in a tank top and underwear, since it's the coldest part of the apartment. 

There's a dull noise coming from her balcony. She stirs, ready to throw a punch if necessary, but there's no one there. She glares at the glass door until the noise repeats. 

And it does, but this time she's close enough to recognize it as a meow.

“Oh, shit,” she whispers. She goes to open the door slowly, as quietly as she can so the cat doesn't run. If it does, it might fall off. It's a very small balcony, she can't imagine it's safe for cats. 

There is a cat in her flower pot. Trying to eat her flower. 

Lila has never had a cat, or any pet for that matter. It was seen as a distraction by her mother, a potential weakness. She even dared to ask for a pet once but her idea was quickly shut down.

So she doesn't know shit about cats, but is extremely excited to see one, hence she immediately picks her up. It's a small, black kitten with huge yellow eyes. She barely weights anything. She can almost fit into her _palm_. 

The kitten looks at her, eyes wide, and Lila coos at her. “Oh, you're just a little–”

The cat lets out a hiss and scratches her hand. In shock, Lila let's her go. 

“Screw you too!” she yells at her. The cat doesn't seem bothered, nonetheless, she runs inside her apartment. Lila follows, making sure to close the balcony door. She really, really doesn't need a kitten falling off her balcony on her consciousness. 

The next ten minutes she spends trying to bribe the cat to come closer to her, but it's a futile effort. The tiny void is quite set on standing on top of her fridge and doing what Lila assumes is cat brooding. She reminds her of Diego.

Finally she gives up and calls for help. She calls Vanya because, she's the sensible one, and seems like a person who'd know about cats. Didn't she mention her neighbour's cat a few times? She has to know about cats. Lila truly hopes so, because God knows she doesn't. 

“I don't know cats, Vanya!” she whispers hurriedly in her phone, as if the cat can hear her. Maybe she can. She doesn't know shit about cats and their abilities. They can see in the dark, which is already something she can't do. “What does she want!”

“Food, water, entertainment,” Vanya starts counting. “Hugs, love–”

“Man, me too.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Anything else?”

“Well, uh,” Vanya thinks for a moment. Lila spends it fidgeting and taking quick glances at the cat, who is sitting and staring at her with her big, dark eyes. “If you're keeping her, probably a name?”

Shit. “I will think about it.”

  
***

The cat's name is Kitty. The first person who meets Kitty in her new home is Ben. 

He shows up at her door with an ice coffee in his hand, because one time Lila got annoyed with them all just arriving at her doorstep whenever they pleased and said they aren't allowed in if they're not bringing her something. She didn't actually mean it, but to their credit they've taken her request seriously, so now they always bring something for her. Usually food or coffee. One time, Ben brought a rock. 

Lila takes her coffee, Ben gives her a knowing smile. This isn't one of those times, but he likes to push to see how far she'll let him go. She wonders if he knows that he's everyone's favorite and can get away with pretty much everything. He probably knows. He's an asshole like that. 

She doesn't even get to mention that there's a new friend in her apartment before she hears Ben squeal in excitement. She doesn't think she's ever heard him make such noise before. 

“You good?” she asks, thinking for a moment that something happened. 

Ben turns around to her, eyes wide. “You have a _cat_ !”

The cat in question immediately gets scared of him and runs underneath the couch. This does not seem to worsen his mood. Lila stands there with a coffee in her hand, watching Ben get on all fours to look for Kitty. 

“Oh my God,” she hears him whisper. 

“Are you okay man?”

“Lila there is a _cat_ in your apartment,” he whispers. She feels a bit less dumb about also whispering when she first met the cat. “And you didn't tell me?”

“You know now,” she shrugs and takes a sip of her coffee. It's already getting warm. Damn. “Her name is Kitty.”

Ben snorts. Lila contemplates throwing him out.

“Do _not_ make fun of Kitty!”

“I'm not! I'm not, I swear,” he moves to sit on the floor, having given up on just staring at her cat as she hides from him. “I love her and would die for her.”

“You will.”

Ben gives her a solemn nod. 

They spend the next hour waiting for Kitty to come from under the couch, and then she promptly runs for the bed. Ben decides it's now his life quest to come here as often as necessary for Kitty to get comfortable with him. Lila knows there's nothing she can do to stop him.

It takes a while for Kitty to get comfortable around Lila, much more around Ben. The first time she wakes up with a cat purring next to her she almost cries. 

One night she comes back from work and Kitty is immediately there, meowing and not letting her walk until she gets her pets. Lila has never been so proud of an accomplishment in her life. 

_2023._

Klaus is in her apartment when she wakes up, which is not much of a surprise. He tends to find himself in weird places at weird times. At this point Lila has gotten used to it. 

She's making breakfast, Kitty is asking to be tripped over, apparently, and Klaus is talking to her about some nonsense that she hears only half of because her brain is still asleep. 

“I always thought I was the weird one,” he muses. She just sat down with her breakfast and he's immediately found himself on the chair across.

“You are,” she says, with a mouthful of cereal. 

“Lila, dearie,” Klaus leans back in his chair and takes a drag of his cigarette. “You're living in a timeline that by all mean should not exist, you're the biggest fear of the time travelling assassin organisation that is now avoiding you like a plague, you live on the third floor of an apartment that an assassin who killed your parents got for you, by means we do not wish to discuss, your best friend is your ex boyfriend and you have a cat named Kitty. And the worst of it all, you are now as we speak eating soggy cereal as if it's not the most disgusting thing I've ever seen.”

Lila looks up at him for the first time since he started talking. “ 'S good.”

“It's _not_.”

“What do you have against my cat?”

“Nothing! She's adorable!”

“Well then, what's the point of this conversation?”

Klaus smiles at her. “Who said there's a point? Must there be a point?”

Fair enough. Klaus rarely makes sense to her anyway. She likes him for it. 

“I'm just a little hurt that you've taken the title of the Biggest Weirdo away from me,” he says, hand on his heart, feigning hurt.

“Your brother spent 17 years as a ghost,” she points out.

“Benjamin Hargreeves is an outlier and should not be counted.”

Lila grimaces and lowers her spoon. “Is his name actually Benjamin?”

“Nah. It just annoys him when I call him that.”

“Whew.”

“Anyway,” he drawls. “Actually, why I'm here–”

“Not just to see little old me?” she pouts.

“That, of course, and,” he leans towards her and picks a single cereal from the bowl. What is it with this family and food theft? “I need a ride. I bullied Diego into giving me a ride to here but he's on about how he has work or some shit and can't drive me to where I need to go, which is to the other part of town, so I thought, hey! Lila is nice, she might be merciful and–”

“Please stop talking, oh my God,” she puts her head in her hands. She never thought she'd be described by another person as _nice_. “It's too early for this shit.”

“Diego said the same thing!” he says, as if he can't believe it. “Granted, I woke _him_ at 7am and it's 11 now but, you know.”

“If you stop talking and feed Kitty while I go change,” she points a finger at him. “I'll give you a ride. One way ticket.”

Klaus puts both his hands around hers. “Lila, you are a saint.”

“I know. Now feed my cat.”

Never before had she thought that this would be what she'd consider an unusual morning. Years before, every morning could be an unusual morning. She had to be ready for anything, there was always a mission to be lead and a person to be taken care of.

It's been three years and the weirdest thing that happens to her nowadays is that she drives Klaus to another part of town when she didn't plan to do so. Which isn't even that weird, giving Klaus a ride is practically her hobby at this point.

It's been three years since the last time she's pulled out the briefcase and thought about leaving. She doesn't remember what it was that led her to taking it out at all, probably just the routine, and she doesn't remember how come she never looked at it again. She can't tell did something good happen, or was it just another day like any other and it just... happened. At that point the days have started blending together. Not in a bad way, in a good way that tells her that it's fine, she doesn't have to count days, she doesn't have to be looking over her shoulder, and this is good, and she can get used to it. And she has. 

It's been three years and she has a home, a family who likes her, and a cat who screams at 2am until she lets her under the covers. If that isn't the perfect life, well, she doesn't want any other. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay now that thats done i have some thoughts to share, i guess?
> 
> This fic is kind of all over the place bc i planned it to be short, like 2-3k, but then it immediately spiraled out of control. So now its just a bunch of kinda random shots of her life which im fine with in the end. 
> 
> It could have been an angstier fic considering her whole deal but i really just wanted to write about her living a good life that she deserves and maybe its too fluffy or smth i dont know or care honestly. Imagine theres many moments in between when she was dealing with her issues that i didnt write abt bc i really dont feel qualified to write abt her mothers abuse more
> 
> I wish i wrote more about her and five but their relationship is so messy im not sure where i would go with it, bc i cant really imagine lila forgiving five, but im v glad people liked their convos in the first chapter, it was super fun to write. I love her and diegos relationship but im not really into them romantically, so theyre best friends here, also god i hope they all get therapy

**Author's Note:**

> ty for reading! hmu @moss_time on twitter, @righteousmoths on tumblr
> 
> a lila playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2C0vmcDYIl8kNVPS1pCH53?si=o2PmcQc0TOO8LWmEEl89sw
> 
> title is from the eagle song by the staves


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